An unusual holiday for an unusual year

It’s Thanksgiving y’all, or Thanksmas in my house.  What’s one more twist on tradition, in a year that has been anything but normal?

I spend every other holiday with my son.  This year, we are together for Thanksgiving and apart at Christmas.  On years like these, we celebrate Thanksmas…Christmas on Thanskgiving.

Since we knew we wouldn’t have Christmas together, my son asked if we could decorate early.  It’s 2020, and we’re looking for joy whenever we can find it.  So hell yeah, we can decorate early!

We have 7 trees up around the house, and the big one went up on Halloween.  We’ve been watching all sorts of holiday movies at his request.  We’ve also figuring out how to budget, buy and wrap gifts when your loved ones are around ALL THE TIME.

It’s different.  And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I certainly do not wish a global pandemic upon us.  I’d prefer it not be here.  However, it is Thanksgiving and a time for gratitude.  I thought today I’d share the lessons this time has given me.  Ones I am truly grateful for.

1.    Break the Rules

Why can’t we decorate early?  Let the kiddo trash talk while we play cards (as long as he gets his mouth in order after the game is over)?  Have dessert before dinner?

I create rules for myself to keep my life in order.  I’d say it’s to stay healthy, sane, and employed.  But it’s really to convince myself I’m in control.  2020 has proven that to be a big ole myth.  It’s not complete anarchy in my house, but I think there’s a lot more spontaneous fun and laughter than before.

2.    Let go of expectations

I haven’t worn makeup or gotten dressed up for work in months.  And I don’t miss it.  The morning routine involves getting into workout gear before jumping on the first call.  Eventually, I find some time for a workout or walking the dogs, and then it’s time to clean up and get on athleisure wear.  

There is so much time and mental energy saved not worrying about “putting on my face” or dressing up.  Seeing everyone in their natural state and normalizing the importance of someone’s brain over their hair has been amazing.

3.    Have grace

The Covid wave has been a real ride over the last year.  I’m learning not only to let go of the judgment and expectations of others, but of myself.  Grace is the word of the year.

I am a planner by trade and usually have my life pretty well mapped out down to the hour.  This year has turned all of that on its head.  All the goals I normally set for myself have gone out the window.  

Instead, I have a few non-negotiables I ruthlessly prioritize, like time with my son and meals together. Everything else fits around that with little guilt and tons of grace if I don’t get things done I had hoped.

Finding gratitude

Tis the season for gratitude in a year that may be difficult to find it.  I’m certainly not grateful that so many have been financially affected by Covid, or who have lost loved ones.  I’m not grateful for all the uncertainty, or not being able to see my family for the last year.

Yet I can be grateful for the small things that have turned out to be big things.  For more time with my son.  A home office that allows me to close the door and take a breath.  Increased self-awareness and improved coping mechanisms.

When I take a moment to look for gratitude, I find it in unexpected ways.

I recognize that this year is different for most.  Lost traditions.  Missed family.  Even with that, I hope everyone has something they can be grateful for.  A small thing that may turn out to be a big thing after all.